Flying Solo

On November 1, 2010, I embarked on the adventure of solo practice as an attorney. What a ride the last three months have been! Here are some of my observations.

I am incredibly grateful for the five years I spent at a firm. I learned things at the firm that I could not learn anywhere else. It was not until almost four years in that I began to question whether I had a long term future at a firm. I started realizing that the work I wanted to do and enjoyed doing was not really the type of work you typically see at a firm. However, the years at the firm taught me the type of lawyer I wanted to be. I learned how to respect other attorneys. I learned how to be friendly and that friendliness can sometimes be the best way to advocate for the client. I learned billing practices. I gained a reputation. I also discovered that I do not like the greediness that is present in litigation. I prefer to work on cases that matter more than the bottom dollar. I struggled with balancing the cases that would pay the firm's bills and the cases that I perceived as being more meaningful. I will always be grateful for the time that I spent learning how to practice law at a firm.

Working from home is a good fit for me. I like the flexibility of being able to work at my own pace without someone looking over my shoulder. I like being able to roll out of bed and go to work immediately. I like wearing what I want when I want without worrying that I am not projecting the right image. My clients often prefer the dressed down look for meetings because it is less intimidating and makes them feel comfortable. Plus, my clients do not look at what I am wearing and think that I am charging the rates I do to dress nice. When you charge someone for your time instead of a product, you have to make them think that you are worth what they are being charged instead of that you are charging a certain amount because you need to support your lifestyle. I also like meeting with clients outside of an office setting. I like being able to do laundry when I feel like it, clean when I feel like it, and not being in a rush to get home each day.

It is easier for me to achieve the right amount of balance when I am my own boss. I know when I need to take a break. I know when I need some time off. I know when I am done for the day and productivity is going to suffer. I did not feel the freedom to make those decisions when I was reporting to a boss. I did not feel as if my time was my own. I did not realize how stressed I felt working in that environment. My bosses were good bosses. I just do not perform at my best when I feel like my life is out of balance. I did not feel comfortable asking the firm to allow me to participate in Vacation Bible School at my church. I did not feel like I could ask to take off to help out the preschool director if I needed to. It was not because my bosses were unwilling to give time off. It was just the personal feeling that I was not carrying my own weight. Now I feel the freedom to be more active in community activities, church, and cases that are not about the money because my time is my own and I will not be letting anyone down. I can balance more areas of my life without feeling like others are judging me for it. And if I mess up and commit time somewhere that is not in the best interest of my business, I am the only one who suffers the consequences for the decision. I like this balance.

God calls Christians to live in the world but to not be worldly. I think that the greatest temptation in my profession is to give in to the things of the world such as money, stuff, power, and prestige. One of my greatest fears was giving in to the sin of materialism by thinking I needed to have the nicest car, house, clothes, possessions. I looked at attorneys that succeed in firms, and the nicest house, cars, power, and prestige often result from that success. But at what cost? So many of those attorneys are miserable, have horrible family lives, sacrifice their reputation, and ultimately come to the conclusion that it is not worth it. I did not want to get to my sixties or seventies and reach this conclusion. I had no desire to be the richest attorney in town or to live in the nicest house or to drive the nicest car. I only have the desire to be the best advocate for the poor, the widow, the fatherless, the oppressed - those that cannot help themselves. I want to be about reconciliation in a society that does not value reconciliation. I want to be about the gospel in a world that needs the gospel above all else. I feel like the best way for me to incorporate this into my practice is by being out on my own where I feel that freedom to share. I know that I am going to be faced with the temptation to make more money and to be the best at what I do. I believe that I can best face that temptation by reminding myself that God calls us to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with Him. That is it. If I make more, it means I need to give more. My motivation for making more should be so that I can give more.

Finally, there are a lot of things that I can live without. I am learning to live without a secretary. I think this will benefit any future secretaries because I have done the work for myself prior to them working for me. I can live without the best of the best legal research subscription. I can live without mileage reimbursement checks. I can live without a receptionist. I can live without the best letterhead, business cards, website, advertisements. I can live without the noise that comes with working in an office. I can live without the fancy office. I can live without the best and seemingly unlimited office supplies. I cannot live without a reputation. Right now all clients are as a result of word of mouth, referrals from other attorneys, or court appointments. I had to build that reputation by being nice to other attorneys and respectful of the court. I had to build that reputation by returning client's phone calls. No client is worth ruining your reputation for. Although there are plenty things I can live without, my reputation is not one of them.

Texas Bowl 2010

Baylor went to a bowl game for the first time since the early-90s. I always said while I was at Baylor that I would support their football program. Life happens, and living several hours away has made it very difficult to keep supporting the program. My "support" usually is watching the two games that play on Fox Sports Southwest each year and following the scores on my ESPN app. This year was no different. I always said that I would attend a bowl game if they ever made it to one. With the decision to become self-employed, it looked like that would not happen either. My brother decided that since Baylor made it to a bowl game, and since the bowl game was in Houston and therefore within a reasonable distance that I could attend, he would get me tickets. Plus, he would allow me to take his wife with me since she had never been to a Baylor game (or a Division 1 college game for that matter) and she and I had never been able to spend one on one time with each other for an extended period of time getting to know each other.

Despite the final score, we had a blast! I introduced Amy to Ninfas, a Baylor tradition that fortunately extends to Houston. My brother bought tickets that were just a few rows up on the 50 yard line! Because of this I was able to capture some cool pictures even with my less than professional camera.

Driving Sin

I am a sinful driver. One of the side effects of being self-employed is that I now spend more time in a car. I like driving. I like the time to myself that it gives me as I think on life, pray, sing, listen to books on tape, or practice what I am going to say. God has used this time to point out some sins that I need to work on. One sin caught me off guard.

Integrity is firm adherence to a moral code or a state of being undivided. I have heard it explained that integrity is acting the same way in a group of people that you would in a room by yourself. There are not many people in this world who have this value. For me, as you can see from yesterday's post, I have been thinking quite a bit on what it looks like to love enemies (and friends). I have also been thinking about the quality of humility. One day as I was thinking on these things, I noticed that my driving was sinful because it was not exhibiting love or humility. I am a selfish driver.

I noticed this when someone else was a selfish driver. It is often so easy to point out the sins in others, but we often can recognize our own sin by seeing the sins of others. Someone cut me off. I was delayed probably less than two seconds as I had to slow down then pass the driver that decided that he should pull out in front of me. I was annoyed. The thought that popped into my head is "What makes him think that his time is more important than mine?" The wheels in my head started turning. I often do just that. I pull out in front of someone because I am valuing my time more than their time. I am showing a lack of respect for the person I am pulling out in front of or cutting off or running through a yellow/red light. If I want to be a person of integrity that values loving people and humility, I am going to have to start in my driving. There is no recognition for being a respectful driver. The other driver is not going to know that I am making a conscience decision to be respectful of his/her time. The other driver is not going to realize that I am valuing their time more than mine. I have decided that this is a good test of integrity for me. Plus, I fail at this test of integrity each and every time I am on the road. Old habits are hard to break. I am constantly having to pray that God will make me more respectful of other drivers by bringing this to mind. There is nothing more humbling than realizing that you are not a person of integrity because you fail to put the morals and values you claim to practice when no one is looking.

I pledge to make a conscience effort to be a more loving driver on the road. I pledge to try not to value my time above the time of the other drivers. I know I will fail at this almost daily causing me to realize my need for a Savior. I confess that for years I did not realize how sinful my driving was. It scares me to think that there are other areas of my life as simple as driving where I am unconscious of the sin. Because of this I am more thankful of God's grace and conviction as the little sins come to light to be dealt with.

Preschoolers and Missions

I have the privilege each Sunday of teaching 4-5 year olds in Sunday school. This can be a challenge since the curriculum ordered by the church leaves much to be desired and because the audience is 4-5. I decided a few weeks ago to try something new. Actually the idea is really, really old. Instead of reading just the watered down, sanitized version provided by Lifeway, I have started reading the stories out of the Bible. Sometimes I have to stop and explain a word or concept. Sometimes I quickly read through a concept I do not want to explain (i.e., the woman at the well's living with someone she was not married to). I have found this approach to lead to some of the biggest changes in how the 4-5 year olds understand the stories and apply them to their lives.

For example, I have several groups of friendships in the class where the friends were treating each other more like enemies. One Sunday I was tired of having to scold the children for the ways they were talking to their friends. One of the books in the classroom had pictures to go along with the concepts that Jesus taught in the Sermon on the Mount about loving enemies. It was almost word for word from the Sermon on the Mount with a few words brought down to their level. I gathered the students and read to them about loving enemies. The children were surprised to see what Jesus said about loving enemies and that we are supposed to treat people the way that we want to be treated.

I have this thing against making children share because I believe that it teaches children an entitlement mentality, increases selfishness in the asker, and is not a realistic preparation for adult living because I, as an adult, do not have to share. To put this simply, I do not like whining children who are trying to manipulate the sharing system to get what they want instead of learning patience being rewarded for the behavior by forcing another child to share. Are there times to share? Yes. Should teachers think about forcing children to share or even teaching them to share? Yes. I prefer to encourage the children to give the other children an opportunity to play with the toy. If they do not want to, I do not force them to give. I have noticed that this approach actually results in more "sharing" but with the children learning how joyful it is to give.

Once I was finished teaching about loving enemies, I observed the children. My form of discipline that day was simply "Is that how you would want him/her to talk to you?" When a child would ask another child for a toy, I would ask the asking child, "Would you want him to ask you for the toy if you were playing with it?" Then I began to notice something strange. The child playing with the toy would give the other child more than the child asked for, a concept clearly taught by Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount. I also noticed that all of the children started talking to their friends better. Clearly, if we are to love our enemies, we are to love our friends. It was exciting to see this change. Plus the change has continued and some of the children are still talking nicely to their friends and getting along with everyone better.

This Sunday's lesson was the woman at the well. Again, I read the story to them from the Bible stopping to explain different things. At the end of the lesson we were discussing how the woman at the well would have been considered an enemy of Jesus and his people because she was a Samaritan. Something happened that I never anticipated. I was talking about Jesus showing love to His enemy by taking the time to talk to her and to share with her about who He is. One of the little boys said, "But if we have to tell our enemies about Jesus, we have to tell the whole world!" Yes, my dear friend, yes! You understand! Using God's word to teach led to four and five year olds understanding it is necessary to do missions. Of course one little girl made it clear that she is not going to the world with the message of God's love, and I hope to be able to remind her of that as I contribute to a mission trip to Africa in fifteen years so that she can see how God changed her heart. A simple lesson in loving your enemies led to missions. I am excited to see where God takes us next!

Blog Dump

I go through phases in my blogging. Sometimes I have lots I want to write, but no time to write it. Other times I have lots of time, but nothing comes to mind to write. Here recently, I have had many things on my mind, but I have been waiting for the right time to write about them. Some may never make it to the blog. Others have been drafted and redrafted in my head many times and are almost ready. There are also ideas that pop into my head that act like they must be written about immediately. When I go through dry spells on the blog, it seems that several of those events occur all at once. This week might be a writing week. You may not hear from me for months afterward. This is not an apology for lack of blogging ... or an excuse. It is just an explanation of how my brain works.

Seasons of Change

It seems that everything around me is changing. Fittingly this season of change is starting in the fall when the leaves change and the weather changes rapidly. I have made a big change in my professional life. After five years of working for a firm, I decided that it was time for me to try solo practice. The timing just seemed right. I realized that I was not working on the cases that I like and that I am passionate about. I also realized that I could if I started my own practice. Therefore, I decided to give up the easy paycheck to work the cases that I am passionate about.

In the weeks leading up to my decision, I kept coming back to the Bible verse Micah 6:8, "What does the Lord require but to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?" I feel like I can best put this verse into practice by devoting the majority of my time to CPS cases and criminal law. I realized that I could maintain my lifestyle with the income from the cases that I love. I have no desire to be the richest lawyer in town. Nothing is more humbling than working with persons who come from the most disadvantaged backgrounds and who have no foreseeable opportunity to move forward in life. I feel that God has given me a passion for this type of law, and I trust that He will take care of me as I pursue what I feel that He would want me to do. I know that there will still be material temptations, but I never want to have to choose between a case that pays more by the hour or a case where life and death really are on the line. As of November 1, 2010, I work for Cyndia Hammond, Attorney at Law!

I must be a nerd

I have come to the conclusion that I am officially a self-proclaimed nerd. Up to this point in life, I think that I have only heard others apply that label to me and I have chosen to use descriptive labels such as nerdy instead of the noun version. However, I am willing to embrace the nerdiness and state that I am a nerd.

I came to this conclusion when I read the transcript of the Supreme Court oral arguments from last week's Snyder v. Phelps case. I read the transcript because I wanted to know how the oral arguments went, I decided not to wait for the audio of the oral arguments to be posted, and I wanted to know what Scalia said. Now I am anxiously awaiting the opinion/concurrence/dissent of Scalia. Notice I said the decision of Scalia instead of the decision of the Court. I think that out of all of the justices on the US Supreme Court, Justice Scalia is the one that I agree with most. Part of the reason for this is that Justice Scalia is rarely, if ever, guilty of making a decision based on emotion instead of the Constitution.

For example, Justice Scalia wrote an opinion that I thought that I did not agree with at the time it was issued. He wrote that a rape victim has to testify in front of the accuser. Although I do not remember the facts of the case now, I am sure it was probably a child victim making the victim someone that society naturally wants to protect. However, there is a Constitutional right of an accuser to confront a victim. Justice Scalia and the Supreme Court upheld the constitutional right of the accused to confront the victim. At the time, I thought it was a horrible decision. The more I thought about it, the more I admired Justice Scalia for taking the facts away and looking only at the text of the Constitution.

I think that the Snyder v. Phelps case is similar. We have a constitutional right to free speech. The government can place reasonable restrictions on where the speech can occur. Those restrictions were in place at the soldier's funeral. The Phelps group was out of the eyesight and hearing of the family. The family member is the one who decided to turn on the TV to see the media coverage (which is a problem with the media, but I will not go there on this one). It was also the family member who decided to go to the website and see what was said about the son and family. Does that mean that the Phelps group should have said the things that they are saying? No. However, that does not mean that they should not have the right to say those things.

I am interested to see if the Supreme Court is going to uphold the group's right to speak in this situation. If there is ever a set of facts that the majority of Americans can get behind and say that it was not right for this to occur, protesting at a funeral qualifies. However, there is a right to protest (I should add peacefully because protesting can get out of hand and protesters can lose the right). I am interested to see what Scalia writes. I hope that he continues to uphold the Constitution. I hope that he resists the temptation to carve an exception to free speech. I think that restricting the group to a particular time and place is sufficient, but I do not think that they should have their speech stifled. I think that the world would be better off if the group would quit saying what it is saying. However, this can be said by someone about almost any group.

Interestingly, the Court will be deciding if the speech was an intentional infliction of emotional distress which is a civil cause of action. There are times when our words, although we have a right to say them, have consequences. I find it hard to pin an intentional infliction of emotional distress on someone who put a thought out there in the public discourse, but did not force the intended or unintended victim to watch. If the media had not jumped on the protesting like they did, the intended/unintended victim may have never seen the speech that harmed the victim. I guess the argument can be made that the speaker knew that the media would cover the event and the speech would be likely to reach the victim. I guess that the ultimate question becomes what speech can have financial consequences outside of threats which already have criminal/civil consequences and slander/libel which has civil consequences.

On a completely different note, I am surprised by the argument presented by Phelps' daughter at the oral arguments. She came off much more articulate and much less crazy than her father. She was surprisingly well prepared and carried herself better in the oral argument than she has in interviews since the arguments (and probably before too). Sure she had some crazy moments (repeated use of "in your grille"), but overall she presented the argument better than I expected (my expectations were pretty low so maybe it was easy to exceed the expectations).

The Problem with the Media

Something else I have been pondering about the scheduled Koran burning is that the media might be just as much at fault for putting the lives of Americans around the world in danger because of their treatment of the story. The burning is scheduled by a small church in Florida. If the media had not jumped on this story and made it much bigger than it probably would ever have been, I bet that very few, if any, lives would be in danger. Therefore, should this pastor decide to go through with his plan, and should someone around the world lose their life because of the decision, the media is at fault too for putting that person's life in danger. The persons committing the violence because of an idiotic display halfway around the world are also at fault, and should receive the blame as well. When idiots in Florida burn a book and idiots in the media cover the event, a person is not excused from responsibility for being an idiot that acts out in violence.

One final set of thoughts. I think that Christians need to be very wise before invoking certain American rights. This pastor has every right under the Constitution to do what he is planning to do. The Muslim community has every right to build a mosque at Ground Zero as well. However, just because we as Americans have the right to do something does not mean that we should do it. Christianity is supposed to be a peace loving religion just as some proponents of Islam state that it is a peace loving religion. However, Christians often take actions that do not promote peace. I am not suggesting peace at the expense of the gospel. There are going to be people who think that you are not promoting peace just because they do not recognize the gospel of Jesus Christ as true peace.

The church in Florida has an opportunity to promote true peace. By burning the Koran in such a public way, the church is Florida is being an example of hatred instead of love. I believe that this is just as unwise as certain Islamic leaders planning a mosque and Islamic cultural center so near to Ground Zero. Do both groups have every right to do what they are planning to do? Yes. Are both groups unwise for planning what they are planning? Definitely. One of the problems in the American church today is we want to talk about our individual rights too much. Just because we have the right to do something does not mean that it is wise to do it.

You Really Should Watch This

If you can make it to the end (I watched in two sittings to get there), you will not be sorry. Wow.



I do not think I have ever seen anyone that fired up sharing their name before they ever get to the heart of their message.

HT: @drmoore and Political Wire

Two Completely Unrelated Things

(1) I have a new reason to watch The Biggest Loser this season. One of the contestants is a woman who was one of my really good friends in middle school and part of high school. You can read more about Sandy here. She lived within walking distance of my house, so I remember hanging out quite a bit. I hate the color pink, but I will be rooting for pink this season on The Biggest Loser! Sandy's brother, Mike, died this past spring just a few days after trying out for The Biggest Loser. His death was due to complications because of his weight. I hope that Sandy and Mike's story will encourage people to get up and get moving. So if you see any Facebook/Twitter posts pulling for pink, I have not lost my mind, but I am cheering Sandy on!

(2) It is probably unfair to include this in the same post since it is so completely unrelated. I do not usually write about things that are too written about on blogs, but I am making an exception for the Florida church. There are some things that strike me about the burning of the Koran in the Florida church. One of the things that struck me was covered here with some of the same thoughts I had about how it might not be smart to burn other people's religious books. Something else that I have been pondering is that this Florida church seems to be willing to risk other people's lives for what they think is the gospel instead of their own lives. It is no secret that certain Muslim zealots are willing to kill, riot, terrorize when someone does something offensive to a belief that they hold dear. There were murders, riots, and calls for death due to a cartoonist drawing a picture of Mohammed. This Florida church knows this. Yet this church is willing to risk the lives of others around the world because it wants to prove a point? What point it is exactly that they are trying to make anyway? We are called to risk our lives for the gospel, not the lives of others. Sometimes our actions for the sake of the gospel may put others at risk. New converts are often subject to persecution and therefore, conversion can result in a risk. However, this church is putting lives at risk without conversion, without risking their own lives, without actually taking the gospel where it needs to go.

Finally, if you have a heart for reaching the Islamic world for Christ, you are not going to do what is quite possibly the most offensive display towards the Muslim community in an effort to reach the community for Christ. We are called to love our enemies, not hate them. Burning the Koran is a sign of hate. I do not like to see millions/billions of people around the world deceived by the Koran, but that makes me pray for those who are sharing the gospel to Muslims around the world, or send money to missionaries in that part of the world, or research ways to share teh gospel with a Muslim, or show acts of love and mercy towards Muslims. Love would not lead you to burn the books just to be completely shut off from all opportunities to share the gospel because of your act of hatred.

I am slightly encouraged to see that the pastor is now "praying" about his decision due to the government attention that he has received and due to the counsel he is receiving from others in the Christian community. I sincerely hope and pray that he considers whether his church's actions are going to bring glory to God and further the spread of the gospel or hinder the spread of the gospel. I cannot think of how this act will spread the gospel. Instead I can only see how it can potentially endanger mission efforts around the world. I do trust that God can use this event to open conversations in mission efforts around the world and hopefully lead God's people to prayer and a commitment to spreading the gospel to those who are of the Muslim faith.